Barclay Press #4

finding myself

Today I felt like Gideon touching the wet and the dry fleece. Like Jim Carrey in Bruce Almighty, asking God for a sign, and getting a whole truck full of them. As if I were trying to decide between two and four, and I decided to roll 100 dice, and every single one came up “four”. Like making two clicks of the Rubik’s cube and watching all the colors line up beautifully.

It was like “all of life was sacramental”. As if God were burning every bush. Like a brilliant playwright was scripting perfect dialogue out of the mouths of every person I met. It’s as if yesterday, I had a ten and a queen, and today I pulled the jack and the king and the ace…and then realized they were all the same suit, and how on earth did I miss that yesterday?

God spoke in the earthquake, God spoke in the fire, God spoke in the huge wind, and God spoke in the still, quiet voice. I heard it all, and I sit here tonight in absolute amazement.

I don’t get to quit my job. 🙂 I am where I am supposed to be. And God is enough.

5 thoughts on “Barclay Press #4

  1. Whew, I’m glad you don’t “get to quit your job.” Honestly, so many times when I hear you speak or write, I have this churning feeling in my gut that you are thinking of moving away from NFC. I keep hearing, “change, new, vision, moving, etc.” and I all I keep thinking is STAY PUT. Not that we can’t make changes within our church body, or take the “old” into a new direction. But I have to admit I like it when things work, I like stability, and dog gone it I like you as Pastor. Thank you for all the amazing work you do at NFC in the lives of so many-including mine!


  2. Sweet.

    Will you print this out and keep it somewhere where you can refer to it on the days when one of the facets on the Rubik’s cube breaks off and the bushes are mildewed and God is strangely silent and your kid is throwing up and you still don’t get to quit your job because you are where you are supposed to be?


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